Baby Steps...

Anyone love the movie "What About Bob?"  Bill Murray plays Bob, a zany hypochondriac who suffers from anxiety, self-inflicted turrets, and a whole slew of other problems.  Dr. Marvin (Richard Dryfus) has written a book called Baby Steps that will solve all of Bob's problems.

The movie may not have a heap of credibility when it comes to helping you achieve your goals in life, but the idea of baby steps is a tool that will forever help you obtain anything in life.  The best things really are worth working and waiting for, and "baby steps" are the best way to patiently reach your destination.

So what are we talking about here?  Quitting smoking, exercise, eating a more balanced and healthy diet, spending more quality time with a family member, finding a better job, improving your finances... etc.

The first step you need to take can be any size, but needs to be taken again and again.  How many times have you said you were going to do something, but didn't?  Started something, but didn't see it through to fruition.  If you ask Jeremy about me that's probably one of his biggest pet peeves with me!  I have started countless projects, lifestyle changes, you name it only to be back to my same old routine the next week.  The only thing I have ever seen results with is baby steps.  If I want to complete a craft project I have to work on it at least a little bit each day.  If I want to get more exercise in I start with just adding push ups, sit ups and squats to my daily routine.  If I want to spend more quality time with my son it begins with turning off my phone, and the TV and devoting some uninterrupted time to playing and interacting.

I encourage you to pick a baby step this week that you can take, and take it every day for 14 days.  2 weeks is all I ask of you. 

Here are some ideas:
~Smoking 2 less cigarettes per day if you are a smoker.

~Drinking 2 less sodas per day if you are addicted to the fizzy cans.

~Walking for 15 min. twice per day.

~Eating at least two vegetables per day.

~Complete 1 journal entry per day.

~Read one chapter of a book.

~Spend 15 minutes of uninterrupted time with a family member or friend.

The opportunities for a baby step are endless and rewarding.  Feel free to comment and let me know what your step is and how you are doing with it.  My baby step is going to be 30 minutes of jiu jitsu drills every day.  I have some friends at the gym who want me to compete in a NAGA tournament coming up, and I need to get back in shape for competition. I'll keep you posted on how I'm doing.

 I know with time our baby steps are going to morph into grown up steps and further into completion of some real goals we set for ourselves.

Happy Halloween! New Craft Projects!

I am a firm believer that Halloween Costumes are to be made and not bought.  90% of the fun that I get out of October 31st comes from bringing a creative idea to life.  This year after much debate and group costume searches we settled on the Adventure Time characters Finn, Lady Rainicorn, and BMO.
BMO= Max

               Finn= Jeremy

Lady Rainicorn=Me (Marissa)

We are on a budget, and I'm happy to report that our costumes (that's right, all three!) cost a mere $1.67.
When the average three person family could have easily spent upwards of $60.00 at a party store, I think we came out with one heck of a deal!

                           



Here we are! Max also had a video game controller, but obviously didn't want to carry it all night. I am surprised that he kept his costume on the whole evening though. It stood up well in crawling tests conducted throughout the evening.


The down side: not everyone watches Adventure Time (hard to comprehend!)
The up side: WE HAD A BLAST!



In other news I happened to inherit a bead loom from a very generous friend.  I've been having a great time tinkering with this. I have only made a couple bracelets, but I've been on Pinterest looking for inspiration for my next project.

 
 

I'm happy to entertain any suggestions for patterns/ideas.  Also, please ignore all time stamps. I don't know why but the date on the camera was not updated correctly.

That's it for now. I promise to post again soon. I'll try to convince Jeremy to as well. He is now the proud owner of a scroll saw. Can't wait to see what he comes up with!

A trick for getting over _____.

I have been keeping myself busy lately with a number of things, especially hanging out with my little dude Max. I am getting the barn ready to host a Halloween party in a few weeks, complete with 4 different scenes to hang out in. I will be taking pictures and posting a before and after of the transformation.
Anyhow, this post has very little to do with my preoccupations, and side projects, but more to do with how to let go of things. I have been tasked with once again helping in the schooling of my 3 cousins and niece, and I couldn't help but notice how often their minds are in a negative space over something that happened earlier in the day, the week, etc.
My first thought was to introduce them to meditation in their daily routine, and teach them how to be in the moment. Upon the first sitting for our meditation I noticed two things, one, when they focused their mind on the task, they forgot about what was upsetting them, and secondly, one of the girls had a preconceived notion that this was not going to work and she was not having it.
After our sitting was finished I had a long conversation with the two newest students Marissa and I acquired and shared my take on getting over whatever is bothering you. I will do my best to break it down into as simple and concise a message as I can. Here it is.

Find the silver lining
This one is an oldie but a goodie. It's become such a cliche that I almost didn't use it, however, I suppose it's cliche for a good reason, it works. It's much easier to be positive and productive if you actively work to STAY positive and productive. Letting one person's opinion, or one job you're asked to do ruin your day is completely ridiculous to me. To me it's the equivalent of finding a quarter on the sidewalk, immediately quitting your job, and acting like you're gonna kick back and live off the interest. You can't let something so minute ruin a day, or even more than a few moments. Know that more moments will come and pass both positive and negative and it's your job to see the good in each of them. Sometimes you have to invent the silver lining or look deeper than you'd care to but trust me, it's there. One of the most difficult things that has happened to me was the passing of my father, it seems awful to see the bright side of something so tragic, however I am constantly thankful for the lessons he passed on to me and I'm excited I get to pass them on to Max. This situation has helped me live in the moment more, to appreciate the time I have with my family more, and focus on making Max's life the best it possibly can be. Those are just a few of the things that have strengthened since my dad's death. If I can find some positive things in my situation I KNOW that you can make an extra 30 minutes at work into a positive situation.

Get perspective and create context
Is this thing that has you in a less than happy state of mind really that important? The answer I come to is usually 'No'. You have to ask yourself are you gonna think about this 2 days from now? How about 5 years from now? If it's not something worth holding on to for the rest of your life and having it affect everything you do, it's probably not wasting the few minutes, or hours that stewing about it will take from you. Everyone gets upset from time to time, but letting it ruin your day is a bit silly. See it for what it is, a moment in time that has come and gone, and you get to decide if it will take something from you (time and energy) or will it add to your growth as a person by allowing you to practice compassion, patience, and forgiveness?

Seeing the past for what it is
This is where we get a little philosophical. I have come to the belief that the past is what you make it. Your POV and how you tell your story paints other people's impressions of you. If you let your past be an excuse or a crutch, there is little that the future can offer you, however if you paint your picture in a positive light and use your experiences as steps to the top of a mountain you can start to realize that you're capable of ANYTHING! My advice to my cousins, and my readers is this. The past is no longer here. It does not exist. The only thing that exists is the memory YOU create. If you are letting the past control your present you're effectively letting something that DOES NOT exist run your life. Do yourself a favor and STOP IT.

I tried to encapsulate a fairly long conversation into a couple of paragraph, so I apologize if it's a bit jumbled. I'll end with one last thought. Time is precious but it is also fleeting. We only get a finite amount of time to spend doing what we love with the people we love. DO NOT WASTE IT by letting what has already passed control where you're going

Working woman...

I swore that I'd never find myself in a florist.  My dad worked in a wholesale florist for my whole life (and most of his too), and my mom has been working in a retail florist since before I came into existence as well.  What I remember was them being exhausted at holidays, over worked, under-payed, tired feet, damaged hands, but loved the connections made with people.  Sure enough, living in Williamstown, I was able to find flexible hours right down the street that would allow me to use my creativity doing something I have quite a familiarity with.  Marlene's Flowers is a lil mom & pop shop. It has all the small town appeal that the great novelists have written about.  I guess you would title me a designer, but I hardly feel qualified for that title (especially knowing the type of work my mother is capable of!)  I took some pictures of my work so far... be gentle :-)

I did the large vase and the small arrangement to the right of it.

I did the two on the top shelf and the tiered arrangement on the bottom right.

This one has some funky colors, but turned out to be one of my favorites.

The burlap ribbon was made by the boss.

I just did the large blue vase.

I get in trouble because I like to put bows on everything.

I've only been allowed to work with silks thus far which I'm cool with.  If you mess it up, it can always be remade into something else.  I hope I do my mama and her years of designing proud!

Besides working at a florist, I will be returning to Redwood in Ft. Mitchell as a sub.  I'm excited to get back to all my friends there :-) I like to devote time to an enriching profession that helps out people who need it.  I recommend to try doing something that puts a smile on other's faces. Generally, that tends to develop one on your own.

Update from Marissa - Completed Sweater and Crazy Fun Evening!

I crocheted my first ever sweater! I'm proud of myself. I remember getting sweaters and blankets from my grandmother that she had knitted.  I never fully appreciated the time and effort that went into that until now.  I'm pleased with the result as a first time trial run, but I'm looking forward to improving on my next attempt. Special thanks to my model Alyssa!  

Now onto our crazy, fun evening we had tonight...

It all started with what seemed to be a typical picnic.  We were invited to tag along to a picnic for Democrats in NKY.  It was held at the Ludlow Knights of Columbus.  We had a great time.  Above are pictures of Max in his cool shades on the way there.  It was nice to have intelligent conversation with refreshing individuals.  There was all you could eat delicious food, and I even drank a beer! Haven't had one of those in a long while.  We went to the picnic to show our support for Jeremy's uncle Bill Adkins who is running for Judge in Kenton, Carroll and Grant counties (vote for him!) As I thought our evening was drawing to a close, we said goodbye's and headed for the car.  This is where Bill approached me about a plan to surprise his daughters.  I'm always happy to be in on a surprise!  Bill asked if I knew where Ft. Thomas is.  I sure do.  I grew up there from the time I was in Kindergarten.  Bill had caught wind of a music festival that was taking place there this evening, and wanted to check it out. I agreed not to say anything and just drive there.  This is where the fun really begins.  As soon as I "missed" the south exit ramp, I knew it was going to be an adventure.  For those of you that know me very well, you know that I am direction challenged.  I often miss turns, forget which street I'm on, and basically have no sense of where I came from or where I am going.  Jeremy is unfortunately burdened by the ten extra minutes on trips to turn around, constant reminders of what street a restaurant is on, and other wonderful features of having a girlfriend who has no geographical clue.  Getting back to the point... as soon as I missed the exit, Jeremy went "ape sh*t". "Go straight!" he yelled, as I veered right onto the north ramp.  "What are you doing?!!??" he continued as I drove on, laughing so hard that he thought I was crying, because of him yelling at me.  Bill, all the while in the passenger seat enjoying the show.  The girls were in the back making wise cracks about how that one beer must have gotten to me.  It was thoroughly enjoyable, especially when we finally got there, and Jeremy realized how mad he had gotten.  It was in the top ten of funniest moments for me.

We finally arrived to the music fest.  There were tons of people!  I ran into a lot of people that I knew from grade school and high school. The Kentucky Headhunters were playing, and they were fantastic!  The drummer was incredible.  He even ditched his sticks and played beats with his hands on his set.  The main act was John Michael Montgomery.  He sang 'I Swear' and finished with 'Grundy County Auction'.  Beside the music, I was able to catch up with a couple that I knew from school.  Tonight really helped me remember how quickly time flies by, and to make the best of every minute.  I talked their ear off, and bragged on my baby boy who was asleep in my arms (yes, through the music.) We exchanged numbers, and said we'd keep in touch.  It was refreshing to catch up with people I had known from 8 years ago.  

The music came to a close, and we started the trek home. The entire car ride home was filled with helium affected voices.  The girls had brought home with them bundles of balloons.  We sang along to the tunes, and listened to classic radio stories on XM. When we finally reached the house, we were all famished. Bean burritos were the cherry on the most fun I've had in months!  It was a blast.  I'll post more pictures of our adventure as they surface.

I am so grateful for this day.  At first Jeremy wasn't going to go, but I nagged him a little (ok, a lot) and he caved.  I think by the end he was glad that he came too.  We needed an adventure, some spontaneity that is almost impossible to accomplish when you have a child under the age of 1.  Thank you to Bill and the girls for helping us have such a great time!   

Habit of gratitude.

Today I am posting about a habit I have tried to form for the last few months. It's basic, easy, and maybe a little hokey but I assure that it is totally worth doing for the 5 minutes that it takes you.
In our everyday lives, we often get bogged down by the little stresses or problems throughout the day, and for a lot of us it carries over into our relations with our family, friends, and even strangers. We may not even realize that we're doing anything at all, but ask yourself how many times have you lived this day.

A stubbed toe in the morning led to a bad commute to work, which in turn led to a slow, problem-filled work day, which then boiled over into an argument with a co-worker or a family over nothing important.
This downward spiral is not uncommon, and believe me, I've lived through a lot of those days. However, through small changes in my thinking, and a habit of gratitude I have come to live more peacefully and grateful even in the face of countless mini-catastrophes. I'll try and share with you just a few ways I combat the negativity through the formation of habits.

Daily Affirmation- No I'm not talking the hokey look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself how great you are, but hey, if it works for you then by all means, do it to it. I approach it a bit different. Each morning I wake up and as I look in the mirror I do 3 things. Smile. Take a deep breathe. Give thanks for whatever I'm feeling especially grateful for at the moment. Most days it's simply being alive and able to experience the world. Doing those things shortly after I wake up make sure my day starts on a good note and I go into the rest of the morning with a positive attitude.

Be mindful of your feelings- This one is a little harder and takes some practice. In a nutshell this practice is simply understanding that the emotions you may feel aren't in control of how you act. That being said, it does get difficult when you're so upset that you are sure steam is coming out of your ears. Giving yourself a few seconds to stop, relax, and put your mind to another task. You can then give the situation time to cool off and revisit it with a cooler head. Realizing that you can be furious, sad, anxious, nervous, etc. but still act in a manor that is kind and calm can work wonders for your interpersonal communication.

Make a list- The last habit that I've focused on is simply writing down 3 things each day that I'm grateful for. This helps in those times when life can't get much worse. When you start thinking about the things around you that other people might not have, or have the means to get, your problems start getting smaller and less important. It's funny how quickly an argument with a co-worker seems so petty when you realize that there are people without clean drinking water, food, or homes. People who can't experience the world in the same way you can on account of disability. If you just jot down a few things that you are grateful for it can do wonders for how you perceive your life, and the problems you have.

I hope these little tips on staying upbeat help you out when you're having a rough day, and remember, thoughts become things, so be sure to keep a positive mind!

Fall Is Here!

Fall has arrived and with it comes some of my favorite foods, namely anything with pumpkin involved. In honor of the new season I'll post a new recipe I've been playing with since the garden produced some good sized pumpkins, bell peppers, and chili peppers.

Usually my Dad was the one that made the chili for our family, but since his passing in January I felt I should learn the magic that is a delicious chili while adding a bit of my own personality into it. 

I used ingredients pictured above as well as

-a larger can of black beans

-1 1/2 medium sized onions

-2 cans of diced tomatoes 

for seasoning the pumpkin I used

-evoo

-salt & pepper

-cinnamon

-brown sugar

-an organic pepper mix I get from a guy at the produce stand. Any pepper or spice mix would work.

I quartered the pumpkin, wiped it down with the olive oil, and seasoned until I felt that it looked delicious. (I usually just wing it with the seasoning by adding about a 3 finger pinch again and again until it tastes how I imagined.)

I put the pumpkin in the oven at 400 for an hour and fifteen minutes. 

While the pumpkin is in the oven doing its thing I gave the bell peppers and onions a large dice while finely chopping the other peppers. 

I coat the bottom of the chili pot with olive oil and start to cook down the onions, after they start sweating a bit add the bell peppers for a few minutes. I then dumped in the cans of tomatoes and the chopped peppers. Let that stew together for a good 45 minutes and add the beans. That can mesh together until the pumpkin is good to come out of the oven. 

All the veggies and beans hanging out

Pumpkin ready to come out and play

Remove the meaty part of the pumpkin from the "rind"? and cut into cubes to puree. Get out the blender and go to town. I only used half of the pumpkin that I baked with the other half to be consumed  in the same dish a few days later. After the pumpkin is all pureed up, just add it to the already delicious party on the stove and cook down for another 20-40 minutes depending on how hungry you are.The longer you let the flavors hang out together on low heat the better, but I am an instant gratification type person and can hardly ever wait. Anyway, without further ado

It was delicious, and I plan on making it again and again. Hopefully my chili gives you some ideas to use in the kitchen for your family.

Be adventurous and creative and make delicious food!